Toi et Moi Earrings in Lab Diamond & Moissanite — Size and Combination Guide
Vai Ra · Earring Guide
Two questions every client asks before ordering a toi et moi earring. Two answers that actually help you decide.
When a client comes to us for a toi et moi earring in lab-grown diamond or moissanite, the conversation almost always comes down to the same two questions. What size should I get? And which stone combination should I choose?
They sound like simple questions. They are not — because both answers depend entirely on the individual: on the size of your lobe, on whether you want the classic look or something that has never been done before. This guide breaks both questions down honestly, so you can come to us already knowing what you want.
Watch — Size & Combination Explained
Vai Ra founder explains size and combination options for the toi et moi earring
The Toi et Moi Earring — What Vai Ra Makes
Round & Pear — 1.84 CT
Stone Shapes Round + Pear
Total CT 1.84 CT
Gold 14KT or 18KT
Gemstone Moissanite or Lab Diamond
Grade DEF VVS
The standard Vai Ra toi et moi earring is a round brilliant and a pear cut, set side by side as studs in 14KT or 18KT BIS-hallmarked gold. Available in moissanite (DEF VVS) or lab-grown diamond (DEF VVS, IGI-certified). This is the starting design — from here, every element can be customised.
Question One — What Size?
Size in a toi et moi earring is not about what looks good in general. It is about what looks good on your lobe specifically. This is the single most important factor, and it is the one most buyers overlook when ordering online.
The rule is simple: the bigger the lobe, the bigger the stone it can carry. A large stone on a small lobe will look overwhelming and may sit uncomfortably. A small stone on a large lobe will look underwhelming — like the earring is not quite there. The proportional fit is everything.
The right size is not the one that looks best on someone else's ear. It is the one that fits yours.
At Vai Ra, toi et moi earrings are available from 0.5 CT total up to 2.5 CT total — that is the combined carat weight of both stones in the pair. The table below gives a reference for how each size reads on the ear.
| Total CT (pair) | How it reads on the ear | Best for |
|---|---|---|
| 0.5 CT Delicate |
Minimal — a subtle two-stone stud with clear shape distinction. Best appreciated at close range. | Small to medium lobes, minimalist daily wear |
| 1 CT Everyday |
Clearly visible as a two-stone piece. Strong enough to read in photographs. The most popular starting size for daily-wear toi et moi earrings. | Medium lobes, daily wear and occasions |
| 1.5 CT Most Popular |
Noticeable presence. Both stones read distinctly at a conversational distance. Photographs beautifully. The sweet spot between statement and everyday. | Medium to large lobes — the go-to recommendation |
| 1.84 CT Standard Design |
Vai Ra's standard design size — round and pear with strong lobe presence. This is what you see in the product images above. | Medium-large lobes, daily wear and occasion-ready |
| 2–2.5 CT Statement |
Unambiguously a statement piece. Both stones visible from across a room. Best on larger lobes — a small lobe at this size will appear pulled. | Large lobes, occasion and evening wear |
How to check your lobe size before ordering
Take a photograph of your ear with a pair of earrings you already own and love the size of. Send it to us on WhatsApp and we will recommend the right carat range for your ear before you commit to anything. This is the single most useful step you can take before ordering a toi et moi earring online.
On the Ear — How It Looks in Real Life
Studio renders show the design. These photographs show the earring as it is actually worn — on a real ear, in real light.
Swipe to see all images
Question Two — Which Combination?
The combination question is really two questions in one: which stone shapes, and which stone types. For shapes, the market has settled on a few clear conventions — but the whole point of the toi et moi format is that there is no rule. The conventions exist because they work well. They are not limits.
The conventional combinations
The two most popular toi et moi stud earring combinations are emerald cut and pear, and round and pear. Both pair a brilliant-cut stone (which catches light from every angle) with a shape-cut stone (which has a defined silhouette and a cooler, architectural sparkle). The contrast in character between the two stones is what gives the toi et moi its visual tension.
Vai Ra's standard design is the round and pear — the most wearable of the classic combinations, available at every size from 0.5 to 2.5 CT. The emerald and pear is available as a custom order.
The less conventional combinations
The toi et moi format was never designed to be conventional. If you want a combination no one else is wearing — two ovals in slightly different sizes, a marquise and a heart, a coloured sapphire next to a white lab diamond — that is a legitimate choice, not an eccentric one. The only constraint is that both stones carry comparable visual weight. Tell us what you have in mind.
| Combination | Character | Availability |
|---|---|---|
| Round + Pear Standard Design |
The most wearable classic. Round gives brilliant light return from all angles; pear gives shape and movement. Balanced — neither stone dominates. | Ready to order. Custom sizes on request. |
| Emerald + Pear Classic |
The other dominant market combination. Emerald is long, cool, architectural; pear is romantic and pointed. Highest visual contrast of the classic pairs. | Custom order — WhatsApp or consultation. |
| Oval + Pear Soft Classic |
Both shapes elongated — less dramatic contrast, more unified. Works particularly well in larger sizes where the length of both stones reads clearly. | Custom order. |
| Twin Rounds Minimal |
Two matched round brilliants — fully symmetrical, no contrast, no hierarchy. The most minimal toi et moi expression. The equality is the entire point. | Custom order. |
| Round + Marquise Bold |
The marquise's long pointed silhouette against the round's perfect symmetry creates strong contrast. Best at 1.5 CT and above. | Custom order. |
| Coloured + White Bespoke |
A coloured stone — sapphire, emerald, ruby, or coloured moissanite — paired with white moissanite or lab diamond. The original Napoleon/Joséphine format. | Custom order — share your colour preference. |
Something never tried before
Every combination in the table above has been made before. If you want something genuinely new — a pairing specific to you — that is exactly what the custom order process exists for. There is no wrong combination as long as both stones carry equal visual weight. Message us your idea on WhatsApp and we will send a 3D render before you commit.
Moissanite or Lab Diamond — Which Stone Type?
Both are available at Vai Ra in DEF VVS clarity. The choice comes down to the optical character you prefer and the budget you are working within.
Moissanite has a higher refractive index than diamond — more fire, more rainbow dispersion, particularly vivid in direct light. In a toi et moi stud where both stones catch light simultaneously, this is amplified. Lab-grown diamond produces a more restrained, white-light sparkle with IGI certification confirming the 4Cs.
On budget: moissanite allows you to go larger for the same spend. A 2 CT toi et moi in moissanite is accessible where the same design in lab diamond costs significantly more. If maximum stone size on your lobe is the goal, moissanite is the practical choice. If the specific properties of diamond — certified carbon, IGI grading — matter to you, lab diamond is available at every size we offer.
Frequently Asked Questions
What are toi et moi stud earrings?
What is the right size for a toi et moi earring?
What are toi et moi stud earrings in oval and pear?
Are toi et moi earrings available in lab-grown diamond?
What gold options are available for toi et moi earrings?
Can I get toi et moi earrings with a sapphire?
What counts as a large-size toi et moi earring?
Can I get a matching toi et moi earring and ring set?
Get Yours Made
Know Your Size and Combination? Let's Build It.
Send us your preferred combination on WhatsApp — stone shapes, stone type, size, and gold colour. We will send a quote and a 3D render within 24 hours.
Or book a free consultation · toi et moi rings · statement earrings